Brilliant British Coppering

[peteryoung]

Today's round of sparkling dialogue:

PY is proceeding along in his motorised vehicle in an orderly manner, he negotiates a busy roundabout and turns off. As he does so he spots a Jam Jar in the queue to get on the roundabout, two cars back, about 25m away. Thinks nothing of it. Turns a couple of corners, pulls into a car park, loosens his seat belt and reverses into a parking space. As he does so, said Police Car pulls up alongside. Winds window down.

Brilliant British Copper (so young it's probably the first time they've let him out on his own): "I noticed as you were on that roundabout that you weren't wearing your seatbelt."

PY: "In fact I was, you're mistaken. You can see it here, it's still over my shoulder."

BBC: "I really don't think you were. I could at least caution you."

PY: "For what? I was wearing my seatbelt. You're mistaken."

BBC: "No I'm not. I could see quite clearly."

PY, seeing where this is going: "Well, it's your word against mine."

BBC: "There's no need to be like that. I'm not going to book you." (I thought only American police used the term 'book'.)

PY: "Well, I wouldn't be "like that" if I had done something wrong, I'd be apologetic at the very least. You were 25 metres away, I was turning a corner and the seatbelt is the same colour as my shirt. Now you're this close you can clearly see I have been wearing my seatbelt. As I said, you're mistaken."

BBC, perhaps frustrated that he's getting nowhere: "Well, let's leave it at that. Consider yourself warned." And drives off.

Obviously not an official warning, just a tetchy one. I'd be happier if he left it with "OK, fair enough." This is actually the second time I've been stopped by the police in the last week; the first time was last Thursday while driving a hire car in Soweto, South Africa, by two black policemen doing licence checks. They even asked me how's the weather in England and if I'm enjoying my time in SA, they were that cordial.

Comments

[dfordoom.livejournal.com]

"Well, let's leave it at that. Consider yourself warned."

We can certainly sleep soundly in our beds, knowing that we have police officers of that calibre to protect us from wrong-doers.

[peteyoung.livejournal.com]

I've always had what I call a healthy disrespect for authority but even I can acknowledge that the police were once much more approachable than they are now. Even if I had a problem which they would be able to address I'd be wary of going near them in case I end up on their blessed DNA database of innocent victims. And the day my brother quit being a special constable because of the corruption was a day of celebration.

[del-c.livejournal.com]

Good for you. Meeker souls would have accepted a caution, which may have been what he was angling for, perhaps to have something to show the sergeant for his day's work.

PS Is "we love your South African policemen" the least-expected phrase since "Jar Jar, you're a genius"?

[dfordoom.livejournal.com]

The police in our area are always very busy dealing with serious crime, like people doing 41 kilometres per hour in a 40 kilometre per hour zone. It's outrageous that anyone could think they could safely control a motor car at such high speeds. The human brain simply can't deal with it. They're so busy dealing with these desperate criminals that they have no time for anything else, so if you ring them about a really trivial matter (like someone being beaten up) you can expect to wait several hours for them to turn up.